Surrogacy: All you need to Know about Donor Conception

Surrogacy—a maze of myths and facts can lead you to think that surrogates can keep the newborn, egg donors are in the field only for money, you will not have inkling about the background of the child and so forth. Read on for certain realities which promise to go a long way in dispensing your fears.

It’s not your Baby!

If you finally have a baby by using donor eggs, sperm or embryos then it’s not “your” baby. Wrong!

Donors of egg, sperm or embryo are expected to give up their parental rights on the embryo and the baby which eventually takes birth. Sperm donations are done in accordance to the regulations guiding cryobanks. Relinquishment of the rights of the donor, have to be documented in the presence of the recipient and the donor. This avoids any future hassles and establishes the “ownership” of the baby in no uncertain terms.

Lack of Genetic Connection = No Parental Connection

Since I am not genetically connected to the baby, I will fail to have parental association in future. Again wrong!

Before pursuing assisted reproductive modes of surrogacy, to-be-parents are advised to meet their mental health experts and counselors. Most parents of donor-conceived children feel that the arrival of a child in their lives is the most beautiful thing that ever happened to them. The level of gratitude towards donors is immense and this helps in developing a nurturing feel for the child which comes their way. 

Where is the Medical History?

There will be no medical history if I am not genetically related to the baby. This is again a myth.

Intended parents are the recipients of consistent and updated information regarding the medical health of the donor and her family. Apart from providing comprehensive genetic information about themselves, donors are also accessible in the event of any future medical complications or situations, which may require additional inputs-regarding their medical and genetic history. 

Fear of Unwanted Claims and Visits

What happens if the donor shows up on my front gate some day? Relax!

It is a well established fact that while recipients have an in depth knowledge in regards to the fitness, demographic and genetic information of the donor, the reverse is not true.

With negligible or no information about intended parents, donors find it difficult to get in touch with their counterparts. Moreover, contractual agreements between the donor and recipient outline the expectations of both parties and lay down the boundaries for all future contacts. 

Monetary Interests of the Donor 

I have heard that egg donors are exploited and indulge in the act only for monetary considerations. Concerning-- but rarely true. 

Though these myths have found their way into media due to some freak incidents, invasive medical screenings, clinic procedures, long time commitments and lifestyle disruptions rarely motivate donors into the act just for monetary compensation. Moreover, tremendous amounts of money are offered to donors for their eggs/embryos and this deters them from raising any unwarranted issues. 

Well, the list of myths goes on and often deters intended parents from going into surrogacy. However, it is important to note that most of these fears are unfounded and delay the process of gaining parental happiness.

 In a nutshell—they are best avoided.